Friday, February 1, 2013 10:35:00 PM
I almost made the mistake of letting my pain shape me
thinking it would be this sad and beautiful thing
I would be a walking novel about what you lost
and people would quieten their voices when I walked by
out of respect, because a ghost just flew by on a gust of wind
I imagined my sad eyes, and my mouth set forever
in a lost little girl pout, glossed over in pink coral
fumbling with my notes, and the letters that I wrote
in a dark corner of the coffee shops and bars around town
I imagined my suicide dress, and how I’d never take it off
and if someone did, they’d find the truth etched into my skin
they would understand the weak and fragile things
the sad beautiful girl lying there next to them, with a yoke
tied to her heart, threatening to crush everything
It wasn’t until after I realised that none of that would happen
your sadness, no matter how deep, is all your own
and every minute, you, as a sad girl in a black dress
with messy hair and chewed off fingernails
claw onto a past and a feeling you don’t think you can shake off
so I let go, and as soon as I did, I saw the sun peak
over the mountains, and it was a new day, a new year
thinking it would be this sad and beautiful thing
I would be a walking novel about what you lost
and people would quieten their voices when I walked by
out of respect, because a ghost just flew by on a gust of wind
I imagined my sad eyes, and my mouth set forever
in a lost little girl pout, glossed over in pink coral
fumbling with my notes, and the letters that I wrote
in a dark corner of the coffee shops and bars around town
I imagined my suicide dress, and how I’d never take it off
and if someone did, they’d find the truth etched into my skin
they would understand the weak and fragile things
the sad beautiful girl lying there next to them, with a yoke
tied to her heart, threatening to crush everything
It wasn’t until after I realised that none of that would happen
your sadness, no matter how deep, is all your own
and every minute, you, as a sad girl in a black dress
with messy hair and chewed off fingernails
claw onto a past and a feeling you don’t think you can shake off
so I let go, and as soon as I did, I saw the sun peak
over the mountains, and it was a new day, a new year